The Doctor Lai Diagnostics thread

[Guest]

Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?

1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever

Login with username, password and session length

[Unkn0wn]

Post your symptoms and Doctor Lai will be able to help you further.


(Soon to follow: the Smokaz & Son Legal Advice thread)

[nugnugx]

Clarification on Nug Nug syndrome , heard it's contagious , i don't wanna get infected.

[Smokaz]

I'm angry, thirsty and experiencing fluctuating paranoia. I also just took a nosedive into a ant hive-size pile of crystal meth situated on my table.

If I actually ever finish LS and become a lawyver, the first order of business for me is suing EIRR for not coming with a medical warning.

- Thanks in Advance, Doctor Lai. Payment will be in the form of executing actions based on the dogmatic set of rules incorporated in the Hitchhiker's Law.

EDIT: GODDMAMNNIT ¤"!¤"!%% WHY DO WORDS DISSAPEAR WHEN I WRITE SENTENCES

[LeoPhone]

The Unknown syndrome: it causes people not to respond on PMs

[Unkn0wn]

Oh right, I was wondereing what the number '15' in brackets next to My Messages meant.

I'll get to it, soon... I'm really tired right now.

[deadbolt]

Post your symptoms and Doctor Lai will be able to help you further.

my sympton: the map leader wont put my maps in and im very fuckin aggrevated; DIAGNOSIS DOCTOR LAI?

[Unkn0wn]

You solved your own medical mystery deadb0lt 

[nugnugx]

EDIT: GODDMAMNNIT ¤"!¤"!%% WHY DO WORDS DISSAPEAR WHEN I WRITE SENTENCES

doctor we have a clinical case here !

[Two]

I have a rash down there, what should i do?

[deadbolt]

Two and Gren seem to reply with ''lol'' alot doctor lai, is this tourettes?

[23:24] EliteGren: Two and Gren seem to reply with ''lol'' alot doctor lai, is this tourettes?
[23:24] EliteGren: lol

[Two]

Its OCD tbh, i dont wana say lol but i have too or i get angry.

[nugnugx]

[Unkn0wn]

So many medical mysteries for Doctor Lai to solve, he might need to hire a team to get them all sorted.

P.S I think Nungunx is suffering from some kind of sexual deviation disease.

[Lai]

Keep it coming. I'll start responding after my exams finish (this friday)

I'm sure I'll learn a lot. The EIR community differs vastly from a normal population  

[BeRzErKeR]

Every time I start reading EIR threads, my head starts to hurt.
What is it doc?

[Smokaz]

Dear Dr. Lai,

If your exams finish this friday, I'm convinced that the decision whether or not to grant yourself time to play some EIRR will ultimately prove whether or not you have moved on completely from useless hobby #1 "gaming". Okay, useless at least for 99% of people who enjoy it.

Further it will lend support to the theory that you have discovered that just being randomly social at the internet (Trolling EIRR forums with a nice badge for example) is more enjoyable and doesn't steal so much capability and attention from your vast intellect.

Thus it stands in your mind that the previous EIRR commitment that for a short and unorganized period in your life stole so much time from you, was keeping back your Einstein-like monster brain from becoming all ex-gamers on a global basis very own Doctor House.

The most convincing reply from you on whether or not to play some EIRR would be "I am worried about being unable to control the amount of time I use on it if I go back", revealing to me a great chance that you somehow you still waste time on some kind of primitive game to keep your sickness in check, and that you're deep inside denying yourself something you want, feigning maturity and responsibility to the public.

In opposition to this I hold the most likely comment, some laish comment unrelated to anything at all, either trolling some attention into your Me-Bank or fooling some of the lesser minds into releasing a tirade of information that you ultimately browse through with a bored grin, but at least somewhere behind a monitor somewhere a small insignificant wasp sting was given to you.

As a absurd and very unlikely reply I present the last alternative, that you admit you are bored of EIRR and gaming, claiming it has no sway over you, identifying you partly as affected by what the 2nd paragraph above this one theorizes, but the revelation also having a side-effect of limp dick effect on everyone interested in your sweet little posts as they start to feel you are not one of them, have stopped wanting to be a part of their interest and are playing them for fools in some kind of twisted, but ultimately useless game beyond granting you entertainment that easily could be matched much in much easier ways.

Lastly if you still play EIRR sooner or later someone will sniff you out, renew your interest by instant rise in love for you as a person and player, and thus destroy your preparations for becoming-doctor related tasks.

[Demon767]

you have to much time on your hands smokaz

[Masacree]

Lai is putting his pro micr0 and pr0 steady hands to work as a doctor?

gl.

[crimsonrabbit]

I can't seem to impregnate little boys. Could there be a problem with my sperm?

[Groundfire]

I can't seem to impregnate little boys. Could there be a problem with my sperm?

Your probably sticking it in the wrong hole. Contrary to popular belief, the best way to impregnate little boys is to actually stick your member into a running garbage disposal.

The turning blades will seperate your sperm into categories of particular chromosomes of which only the X can be administered to other boys.

The correct sperm will be funneled through the house's plumbing system and collect in the shower head of the bathtub belonging to the boy you wish to impregnate and as such will be released on his return to cleanse his shameful beaten body of your prior advances.

Disclaimer: If you experience a tad amount of blood during first penetration of the disposal, DO NOT PANIC, it is completely normal and is only a temporary side effect of the sperm seperation process. The cut will clot as soon as your penis is removed by the disposal for sperm inspection.