Mysthalin
Tired King of Stats
Posts: 9028
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« on: July 04, 2011, 05:16:42 pm » |
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So, anyone have any funny run-ins recently? Had one today, so I decided to share :
Run into a religious preacher woman. She starts talking about Jesus and heaven and stuff. Clearly not taking the hint when I tell her I'm militantly anti-religion, she continues trying to convert me by asking me whether I'd prefer an eternity in bliss in the most beautiful place ever or in hell. I respond to her by reminding her that nowhere in the Bible is hell even mentioned. She quotes something about Mark 59:8 or something like that, which doesn't even mention hell either.
So at that point I decide to indulge her. I begin: "Well, Mark is only a scribe. Basically, just a human being, and frankly his word is as plausible as mine. If there's one piece of scripture from the entire Bible that's got any plausibility of being God's word it's the Old Testament. And that one clearly states the women are meant to stay in the kitchen".
She shut up and let me go after that.
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NightRain
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« Reply #1 on: July 04, 2011, 05:21:16 pm » |
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lol owned
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Because a forum post should be like a woman's skirt. Long enough to cover the subject material, but short enough to keep things interesting.
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smurfORnot
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« Reply #2 on: July 04, 2011, 05:24:57 pm » |
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Jesus will save you Myst!
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PonySlaystation
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« Reply #3 on: July 04, 2011, 05:40:57 pm » |
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I like the old testament. If a woman kicks you in the nuts you have the right to cut off her hand. Those were the good ol' days...
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Sharks are not monsters Henley, they are cute, cuddly and misunderstood. They love humans. sometimes they love TOO much. They love people so much that sometimes their kisses separate people into two flailing pieces which are consumed by other sharks in a frenzy of peace and joy.
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tank130
Sugar Daddy
Posts: 8889
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« Reply #4 on: July 04, 2011, 05:55:01 pm » |
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Two ministers doing missionary work in the South Seas are captured by a tribe and tied to stakes. The Chief of the Tribe says to them, "You have a choice - Death or Ugga Bugga" The first minister says, "Well, I guess Ugga Bugga". The Chief shouts "UGGA BUGGA!!" and thirty members of the tribe throw the minister over a stump and fuck him up the ass for several days.
The Chief then asks the second minister, " Now you have a choice, Death or Ugga Bugga" The minister says,"Well, my religion does not allow me to choose ugga bugga, so I suppose it must be death." The Chief says, "Very Well." Then he turns to the tribe and shouts, "Death!! But First, UGGA BUGGA!"
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Geez, while Wind was banned I forgot that he is, in fact, totally insufferable
I'm not going to lie Tig, 9/10 times you open your mouth, I'm overwhelmed with the urge to put my foot in it.
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Killer344
The Inquisitor
Posts: 6904
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« Reply #5 on: July 04, 2011, 06:02:51 pm » |
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LOL....
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If I get shot and it's a gay medic fixing me up, he's not gonna be fondling my balls while he does it. You can't patch a chest wound and suck a cock at the same time.
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Smokaz
Honoured Member
Posts: 11418
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« Reply #6 on: July 04, 2011, 06:10:13 pm » |
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Jack, its not nice to drool on a thread.
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SlippedHerTheBigOne: big penis puma SlippedHerTheBigOne: and i have no repairkits SlippedHerTheBigOne: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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TheIcelandicManiac
Resident forum troll. Fucked unkn0wns mom
Posts: 6294
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« Reply #7 on: July 04, 2011, 06:25:59 pm » |
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i enjoy the fact that most people younger than 30 here on iceland are atheist so you don't have to hear arguments about people who do belive in A god for they know to keep quiet.
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Soon™
gj icelandic i am proud of u Sometimes its like PQ doesnt carrot all.
Work Harder
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Rocksitter
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« Reply #8 on: July 04, 2011, 07:19:52 pm » |
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Don't go near that middle eastern religion it will rot your brain....
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TheVolskinator
Administrator / Lead Developer
Posts: 3012
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« Reply #9 on: July 04, 2011, 07:41:13 pm » |
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^lolbias
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Vermillion_Hawk
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« Reply #10 on: July 04, 2011, 09:13:30 pm » |
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Technically all of the major world religions are middle eastern...
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What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets.
- Andre Malraux
- Dracula
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Spartan_Marine88
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« Reply #11 on: July 04, 2011, 11:29:17 pm » |
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Technically all of the major world religions are middle eastern...
Hmm, Buddhism amd Confucianism are most deffinitly not middle eastern, and yet both are quite huge
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Yes that's me, the special snowflake.
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RoyalHants
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« Reply #12 on: July 05, 2011, 01:28:44 am » |
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OWNED!
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Yeah calbanes, I mean - some people like smokaz are still yet to win a single game, even though they've been around here for years.
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PonySlaystation
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« Reply #13 on: July 05, 2011, 03:21:24 am » |
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i enjoy the fact that most people younger than 30 here on iceland are atheist so you don't have to hear arguments about people who do belive in A god for they know to keep quiet.
You don't worship norse gods anymore? You have abandoned your culture and proper faith!
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Demon767
Warmap Betatester
EIR Veteran Posts: 6190
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« Reply #14 on: July 05, 2011, 03:23:04 am » |
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Asians have no god lololollol
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Generalleutnant of The Reichs Wolves Nevergetsputonlistguy767
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RoyalHants
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« Reply #15 on: July 05, 2011, 03:24:50 am » |
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Asians have no god lololollol
STOP TALKING ABOUT ASIANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Demon767
Warmap Betatester
EIR Veteran Posts: 6190
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« Reply #16 on: July 05, 2011, 03:27:04 am » |
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Did i hear... ASIANS!?
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RoyalHants
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« Reply #17 on: July 05, 2011, 03:28:28 am » |
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Mister Schmidt
Lawmaker
Posts: 5006
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« Reply #18 on: July 05, 2011, 03:32:43 am » |
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Asians are the best.
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and 6th " Main Thing " is you have to Chant " hare krishna hare krishna krishna krishna hare hare hare rama hare rama rama rama hare hare ".
"Seeing Bigdick in his full sado mask attire, David couldn't help but feel a tingle in his special place.."
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EIRRMod
Administrator / Lead Developer
Posts: 11009
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« Reply #19 on: July 05, 2011, 03:56:44 am » |
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Asians are the best.
Meh. I like Tig Bitties.
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Shit I'm pretty sure you could offer the guy a cup of coffee and he'd try to kill you with the mug if you forgot sugar.
That's like offering Beer to fuck the fat chick. It will work for a while, but it's not gonna last. Not only that, but there is zero motivation for the Fat chick to loose weight.
Why don't you collect up your love beads and potpourri and find something constructive to do.
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