*

Account

Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?
November 29, 2024, 03:18:13 pm

Login with username, password and session length

Resources

Recent posts

[November 01, 2024, 12:46:37 pm]

[October 05, 2024, 07:29:20 am]

[September 05, 2024, 01:54:13 pm]

[July 16, 2024, 11:30:34 pm]

[June 22, 2024, 06:49:40 am]

[March 08, 2024, 12:13:38 am]

[March 08, 2024, 12:12:54 am]

[March 08, 2024, 12:09:37 am]

[December 30, 2023, 08:00:58 pm]

[February 04, 2023, 11:46:41 am]
Pages: [1] 2   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Funny lifetime storys.  (Read 7300 times)
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
TheIcelandicManiac Offline
Resident forum troll. Fucked unkn0wns mom
*
Posts: 6294


« on: July 13, 2011, 05:45:06 pm »

Well i was reading Ghosts story on the launcher and i got an great idea.


If you have any funny lifetime storys and tips you could give to the younger people of the community post them here, i personaly havent had any exiting times of my life exept when i got robed that one time in denmark and punched a polish guy but do tell.
Logged

Quote from: Grundwaffe
Soon™
gj icelandic i am proud of u  Smiley
Sometimes its like PQ doesnt carrot all.

Work Harder
Hicks58 Offline
Development
*
Posts: 5343



« Reply #1 on: July 13, 2011, 05:51:31 pm »

Wouldn't mind adding to this, but my life story is somewhat mundane and somewhat grim in some parts. Nothing really funny to be fair. Well, apart from having one of my brothers run at me full force with one of those space hoppers when I was younger - Sent me through next doors fence where I promptly started waving to their window and started laughing. Good times.

Some of the characters we have on this forum though, it's got to have been a funny ride to have made some of our more egocentric fellows here.
Logged

I mean I know Obama was the first one in EiR to get a card. and tbfh the Race card is pretty OP. but Romney has the K.K.K., those guys seem to camo anywhere. So OP units from both sides.
At the end of the day, however, stormtroopers finally got the anal invasion with a cactus they have richly deserved for years.
brn4meplz Offline
Misinformation Officer
*
Posts: 6952


« Reply #2 on: July 13, 2011, 05:53:05 pm »

I've got too many to remember. There usually has to be a situation the jogs my memory of an event.
Logged

He thinks Tactics is a breath mint

Wow I think that was the nicest thing brn ever posted!  Tongue

the pussy of a prostitute is not tight enough for destroy a condom Wink
Mysthalin Offline
Tired King of Stats
*
Posts: 9028


« Reply #3 on: July 13, 2011, 05:57:34 pm »

I became world ruler once, but then reversed the mind control machine once I got bored of putting cucumbers up unknown's bum.
Logged

deadbolt Offline
Probably Banned
EIR Veteran
Posts: 4410



« Reply #4 on: July 13, 2011, 06:47:14 pm »

i remember tryna nail my ex gf in the sea in dubai. but it was a man made island and i fell of the edge of it into deep sea, and she lost her bikini bottoms, so i had to fetch her new ones from the hotel. it was so obviously clear what we was doing it was rather fail, but epic win at the same time.
Logged

DERDBERT
Like Jesus, Keeps died for us

He made a funny thread for bear, and got banned.

Now bear makes his own funny thread. It's unsurprisingly not funny.

Keeps died for our funny threads.
Katusha Offline
EIR Veteran
Posts: 989



« Reply #5 on: July 13, 2011, 06:51:54 pm »

i remember tryna nail my ex gf in the sea in dubai. but it was a man made island and i fell of the edge of it into deep sea, and she lost her bikini bottoms, so i had to fetch her new ones from the hotel. it was so obviously clear what we was doing it was rather fail, but epic win at the same time.

lol did she try to save you with her bikini bottoms, but then she let go so you and her panties fell in the sea?

i dont even know....
Logged
Demon767 Offline
Warmap Betatester
EIR Veteran
Posts: 6190



« Reply #6 on: July 13, 2011, 06:55:54 pm »

lol did she try to save you with her bikini bottoms, but then she let go so you and her panties fell in the sea?

i dont even know....

that's very poetic hahaha
Logged


Generalleutnant of The Reichs Wolves

Nevergetsputonlistguy767
Groundfire Offline
EIRR community manager
EIR Veteran
Posts: 8511



« Reply #7 on: July 13, 2011, 07:26:34 pm »

lol did she try to save you with her bikini bottoms, but then she let go so you and her panties fell in the sea?

i dont even know....

oh oh oh! I know this one!





Ending scene from Titanic?
Logged

Latest Shoutcast:
EIRR Groundcast 11 "The Super Dev Showdown!!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IOGm79rXWhU (full version)

Unkn0wn Offline
No longer retired
*
Posts: 18379


« Reply #8 on: July 13, 2011, 07:28:46 pm »

i remember tryna nail my ex gf in the sea in dubai. but it was a man made island and i fell of the edge of it into deep sea, and she lost her bikini bottoms, so i had to fetch her new ones from the hotel. it was so obviously clear what we was doing it was rather fail, but epic win at the same time.

Did you know they can put you in jail for just kissing in public in Dubai?
Logged
EIRRMod Offline
Administrator / Lead Developer
*
Posts: 11009



« Reply #9 on: July 13, 2011, 07:37:25 pm »

I've got too many to remember. There usually has to be a situation the jogs my memory of an event.
Wow.

Im right here with brn on this one.  The situation that jogs my memories is usually copious amounts of alcohol - which has the reverse effect of me trying to FORGET them.
Logged

Quote from: brn4meplz
Shit I'm pretty sure you could offer the guy a cup of coffee and he'd try to kill you with the mug if you forgot sugar.
Quote from: tank130
That's like offering Beer to fuck the fat chick. It will work for a while, but it's not gonna last. Not only that, but there is zero motivation for the Fat chick to loose weight.
Quote from: tank130
Why don't you collect up your love beads and potpourri and find something constructive to do.
Katusha Offline
EIR Veteran
Posts: 989



« Reply #10 on: July 13, 2011, 08:14:18 pm »

oh oh oh! I know this one!





Ending scene from Titanic?

holy shizzle, i wasn't even thinking about Titanic  Cheesy
Logged
deadbolt Offline
Probably Banned
EIR Veteran
Posts: 4410



« Reply #11 on: July 14, 2011, 05:29:52 am »

Did you know they can put you in jail for just kissing in public in Dubai?

yeah, even for holding hands. but this was within the confines of the hotel grounds.
Logged
TheIcelandicManiac Offline
Resident forum troll. Fucked unkn0wns mom
*
Posts: 6294


« Reply #12 on: July 14, 2011, 05:57:19 am »

Wow.

Im right here with brn on this one.  The situation that jogs my memories is usually copious amounts of alcohol - which has the reverse effect of me trying to FORGET them.

I've got too many to remember. There usually has to be a situation the jogs my memory of an event.

Well please go jogging sometimes and come here and post the storys  Wink
Logged
Malgoroth Offline
Donator
*
Posts: 960


« Reply #13 on: July 14, 2011, 07:26:30 am »

I was a junior in high school, and every other day my first was class was science. The teachers name was coach Floyd and he was a rather popular teacher among students because just about every day he'd put on videos for us to watch that went over whatever it was we were supposed to be learning rather than teach it himself (American education system ftw). He was the kind of teacher who just didn't give a shit. This was perfect for me since movie + lights off + first period + "teacher" = fucking nap time. Every day where I had that class, without fail, there would be a video and I could catch up on the sleep I didn't get the night before, and since this was only a month into the school year my body wasn't yet ready to wake up before 12pm. One day I arrived to class and proceeded to pass out as I usually did and after about an hour I woke up to a dead silent, completely engrossed classroom gazing speechlessly at some intriguing images on the TV. On the screen were 2 skyscrapers engulfed in flames and shots of panicked, frightened people either gazing up at the sky, or fleeing in terror. This seemed much more interesting than the typical crap we watched in that class so rather excitedly I asked "Ah cool! What movie is this??"    
« Last Edit: July 14, 2011, 07:28:13 am by Malgoroth » Logged
TheVolskinator Offline
Administrator / Lead Developer
*
Posts: 3012



« Reply #14 on: July 14, 2011, 07:55:53 am »

MMkay, so you all know that Im employed at a local boathouse (or should :| ). A few years back a damn funny joke we had was "Find the smell." Boathouse smelled like a goat's ass and nobody could figure out why. About 2 months into the spring/summer season, our staff director told us to go under the boathouse building its self and take a look at the plumbing. Got there, looked fine, but one spot in the piping smelled absolutely shit terrible and had a small leak. After about an hour of trying to remove the damned piping we finally got it off only to discover what the hell was clogging the pipe. There was a giant wad of paper with a single dollar bill sticking out of one side, with a huge lot of backed up shit (literally) behind it. Traviss, a co-worker, pointed at it and said "Shit guys...that's a poop dolla'. "

Every day for the last 4 years, someone has made a poop dolla joke at the boathouse.
Logged

Quote from: tank130
I want to ensure we have a 100% decision on the process before we do the wipe.
If not, then I wipe, then someone gets something they shouldn't, then it gets abused, then the shit hits the fan and then I ban shab.

Getting EiR:R Released on Steam

Forum Rules & Guidelines
Mister Schmidt Offline
Lawmaker
*
Posts: 5006



« Reply #15 on: July 14, 2011, 08:05:58 am »

This one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute up my pussy.
Logged

and 6th " Main Thing " is you have to Chant " hare krishna hare krishna krishna krishna hare hare hare rama hare rama rama rama hare hare ".
"Seeing Bigdick in his full sado mask attire, David couldn't help but feel a tingle in his special place.."
velocity78 Offline
EIR Veteran
Posts: 190



« Reply #16 on: July 14, 2011, 08:08:19 am »

This one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute up my pussy.

sounds like something out of American Pie
Logged

3rdCondor- just hand out reward points and ppl will shut up 
tank130-How about people shut up and we hand out reward points... just a thought

Velocity, why you no let us do public lynching? Sad
Smurf has a serious fucking problem..
Mister Schmidt Offline
Lawmaker
*
Posts: 5006



« Reply #17 on: July 14, 2011, 08:11:07 am »

It is Cheesy
Logged
PonySlaystation Offline
EIR Veteran
Posts: 4136



« Reply #18 on: July 14, 2011, 08:19:30 am »

Did you know they can put you in jail for just kissing in public in Dubai?

yeah, even for holding hands.

But, but WHY??!!
Logged

Sharks are not monsters Henley, they are cute, cuddly and misunderstood. They love humans. sometimes they love TOO much. They love people so much that sometimes their kisses separate people into two flailing pieces which are consumed by other sharks in a frenzy of peace and joy.
deadbolt Offline
Probably Banned
EIR Veteran
Posts: 4410



« Reply #19 on: July 14, 2011, 08:24:20 am »

cos theyre arabs tbh.
Logged
Pages: [1] 2   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

TinyPortal v1.0 beta 4 © Bloc
Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.9 | SMF © 2006-2009, Simple Machines LLC
Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
Page created in 0.091 seconds with 36 queries.